There are some songs that are so memorable to me that I am taken back in time when I hear them. One of these songs is called "Let the Flame Burn Brighter" by Graham Kendrick. The chorus goes,

"Let the flame burn brighter in the heart of the darkness, turning night into glorious day, let our song grow louder, as our love grows stronger, let it shine, let it shine.

This song brings me back to Urbana 93. It was Dec. 31,1993 that I made the decision to pursue ministry. I had big dreams then. I saw myself as a witness to that flame that burns bright in the heart of the darkness. I thought I would be an instrument to turn the night into glorious day. I envisioned large crowds coming to faith or at least being part of a movement that will bring about a revival of faith.

For various reasons, this big dream has become a broken dream. I had to rethink my life, what had become of that dream. A new vision came to me, its a thousand little candles bringing light to a dark world. Those candles, by themselves, look insignificant. By themselves, they could not push back the darkness.

Those individual candles are like most of us. Our lives may not look significant. However, combined with all those other little candles, we become part of a movement to bring light into a dark world.

Maybe our sphere of influence is not a big auditorium. Maybe our sphere of influence are three kids who know the love of Jesus because of us. This is God's plan, that little candles will spring up throughout creation, bringing light into a dark world. 

God sent the Holy Spirit as a tongue of fire that descended on individuals. It did not come as the spectacular sight of a big fireball. The challenge for many of us is to fight the despair that comes from starting out with visions of a big flame only to find ourselves as little candles. God is using little candles to bring light into a dark world. To God be the Glory.

I have been critical of the idea that Christianity is all about a personal relationship with Jesus. Don't get me wrong, it is true that to be a Christian is to have a personal relationship with Jesus. My problem before was that some Christians see themselves as having a pipeline to God. They don't have to listen to preachers, to other Christians in history, etc. They have their bible and hear directly from God. This God is usually only concerned about their personal fulfillment, and not about loving their neighbors, especially the helpless.

I realize now that sometimes everything has to melt away and look at yourself as standing right before God. People have many expectations of us and it will drive us insane if we think too much about what other people think of us and how we are conducting our lives. Not that it is not important what people think, but we must remember that God is ultimately the judge of our hearts. We must listen to his voice to help us know if there are any error in us, and then humbly acknowledge those errors to God and to others.   

I believe that when the bible says "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom", it invites us to let everything melt away and then invites us to stand before God with an open heart, ready to accept his correction and his forgiveness. Our "wisdom' is sometimes clouded by people's expectations of us. We act sometimes based on what others expect of us instead of acting based on what God expects of us. For example, we could be afraid of losing the friendship of someone who expects us to be supportive of him no matter what he does, therefore, we never question his behavior. However, to fear the Lord would require us to tell the truth about a friend's behavior, even if it means losing that friend. God must stand above everything in our lives. That is what it means to fear the Lord. 

I loved the prequel to the Star Wars series. It was intriguing to see the process in which Darth Vader became who he is. The Star Wars prequel helped us become familiar with Darth Vader by recounting the story of Anakin Skywalker, the man who became Darth Vader.

I have been thinking about people who claim to know Jesus but have worldviews that are contrary to the Jewish worldview. There are some who claim to know Jesus who believe that everything is God (Pantheists). There are some who claim to know Jesus (or at least understand his teachings and seek to apply them) who believe that God is not involved in history (Deists). 

A recent sermon by my Pastor has brought me to a reflection on the words above the cross "King of the Jews." Is this just mocking words  or a statement of Jesus' claim, which is also his crime? Or did God also intend for these words to be a statement of Jesus' identity, an identity we must explore if we are to know Jesus fully?

I believe that the second statement is true. God intended the statement above the cross to be a prequel to the story of Jesus. In other words, if we want to know Jesus, we need to look at the story of the Jewish people and their aspirations concerning their king. This story is recorded in the Old Testament. In the Old Testament, we find out that the throne of the king is also the throne of the personal God who created the universe and liberated the Jews from bondage (Psalm 2). In the Old Testament, we also find out that the King of the Jews will become the king of all nations (Isaiah 11).

We cannot make up a Jesus who fits our own worldviews or mindsets. Jesus could not be one of many gods in a pantheon. Jesus could not just be the ideal human being. Jesus could not just be a regular prophet who teaches us about God and his standards. Jesus is the ultimate king of the Jews, the one who fulfills the human aspiration for shalom (Matthew 11:25-30). Any other Jesus is not the true Jesus. May you turn to the King of the Jews for the peace that your heart longs for.       

In my days as a Marine, I heard a Marine sergeant talk about how he would deal with an insubordinate Marine. He said he would not put him on trial for insubordination, thereby causing him to lose pay. He said he would deal with him by taking him outside and fighting him, and even if he loses, the insubordinate Marine would be in a bad shape. This Marine sergeant was proud of his attitude, that he is confident of his physical power.

A person who uses positional power (a commanding officer who threatens a subordinate with loss of pay) or physical power (a sergeant who threatens physical harm) are both acting in a way that negates the gospel. Both people are worshipping power. They deny the Lord who calls us to be servants to each other, instead of Lording it over each other. This same Lord Jesus served us by dying in place of those who believe in him so that they may become right with God. 

I have been a person who worships power. One illustration of that is my joining the Marine Corps because I wanted to be considered so tough that I was able to go through initiation into the toughest branch of the Armed forces.

I had a profound discovery as I now work as a Childcare worker. That discovery is that my influence is stronger when I am more focused on being gentle than on being tough. People respond better to a gentle firmness than harsh use of power. The effects of the harsh use of power is temporary. It does not effect lasting change. The person being controlled by power will rebel against that control when he becomes stronger, and the cycle of violence continues. It is unwise to control people through power (physical or positional), unless as a last resort, when a person's insubordination is endangering the peace of the group. But even then, effort must be made to bring the insubordinate one to reconciliation.

God in his wisdom displays his power through the cross, a seeming display of weakness and defeat. As you are tempted to control others, your children or anybody else, by using any form of power (physical, positional, etc), think of the Savior who did not think of his own honor (the reason people usually resort to harsh use of power), but of our need. He did not come to judge us who are insubordinate, but to save us from God's wrath by dying on the cross in our place.

This may say something about me, but family related images in scripture don't really touch my heart. Last time I spoke about adoption, about how it was not a meaningful concept to me until one moment at work. I heard one of the children I work for basically told me that being adopted would really prove to him that staff care for him.

There is another family related concept that I did not care much about in scripture, that is the concept of inheritance. I don't really think about God giving me an inheritance. Do we really need things in the new creation? I know the Holy Spirit is thought of as an inheitance but I really did not understand why the Holy Spirit would be called an inheritance.

A way to understand inheritance is to suspend our over-spiritualization of the scriptures. The scriptures are down to earth. It is true that the most important aspect of the promise to the descendants of Abraham is being called God's people, a spiritual concept. However, we usually don't think that the giving of land is an integral part of being God's people.

The giving of the land or having an inheritance in God's land is an expression of God's care. A father leaves his possessions to his children so they can be cared for. It is a sign of the father's continued care for his children. It is the father's affirmation that his children belong to him. It is a sign to the children that their father cares for them.

Land is life. It is through the land that a person gets his livelihood. When Israel lost the land because of their sin, it was a sign of being driven out from God the father's care. Of course, God still cared and provided for Israel. However, it is not the same.

Israel was not in God's presence anymore. I know God is present everywhere, but he is especially present in the temple, where God chose to have his dwelling among his people. By losing the land, Israel has lost its place in God's presence.

So what do we make of the idea of inheritance. Jesus has replaced the temple as the place we go to be in the presence of God. Jesus is God incarnate. As believers, we are in the presence of Jesus. That is our inheritance. It is the symbol of God's care that he brought us to Jesus. We are taken care of for all eternity.

I don't know if we are all going to have our own spaces when Jesus comes to establish the new heavens and the new earth. I think what is important to know is that we, as believers, will have a place in Jesus' presence. That is our inheritance.

     There are some teachings in the bible that does not naturally touch my heart. One of these teachings is adoption- that Christians are adopted as sons of God because of Christ's sacrifice. It probably does not touch my heart because I have not experienced being an orphan. Also, for a variety of reasons, being part of a family was not a big deal.

     I remember the first time I appreciated this doctrine. One day at my work, one of the kids made a statement that stuck to my mind. He said, "if this staff member really cares for me, then she would adopt me." 

    At first, I thought I would respond by making an excuse for the staff member not being able to adopt him. However, as I think about it, I realized that a residential facility could never be a home. Staff come and go into the life of the kids. Staff's life is not tied to the child's life.

     In a family, the life of the parents who have committed their life to the child is bound with the life of the child. When a child is sick, the parent would sometimes stay near the child for a whole night. This kind of committment is what this child was looking for, and staff members could never provide that committment. What this child needs is a family that would bind their life to his life. That is his deepest desire.

     All of us sometimes feel alone. We need someone who is committed to us in the midst of sin, disappointments, and finally death. We need someone who will bind his life to our life. Ultimately, the death of Jesus, God's son, is the expression of God's binding his life to the life of the believer. As one song says "I'm forgiven, because you were forsken". 

     May you find comfort in God's binding his life to your life, a truth expressed in the word adoption. As Christians, may we reflect in our committment to others, the committment of our God who adopts us into his family.

     One day, my daughter and I were putting together her train tracks. She would hand me pieces of the train tracks and I help her put it together. I realized that the overall shape of the train tracks was dependent on what pieces she gives me.

     Some of us struggle with regrets. I regret sometimes that I was not born in an evangelical Christian family that values Christian ministry (missions, evangelism, etc.). That piece of my story has a profound effect on who I am today. One effect of that piece is that, while I wanted to dedicate my life to ministry, there is a part of me that wants to please my parents by having a stable life and better yet, having material prosperity. I hate to admit it, but I was looking for a comfortable ministry. Well, those two (being upper-middle class and being in ministry) do not usually mix. For one thing, depending on money from supporters makes life unstable.   

     As my daughter and I continue to build her train tracks together, I noticed that the train tracks came along nicely anyway. In the end, we have a decent train track.

    Sometimes we fear that because some pieces of our lives do not seem to fit with our vision of our future, that our lives are not what it could be. It is true that life may not look the way we want it to look. We may not become what we dreamed we would be. However, if you do the right things in God's eyes, your life is making a difference for God's purposes.

     The apostle Paul writes, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" (Rom. 8:28).  The "things" are the pieces of our lives, some may seem bad and some may seem good. The apostle Paul is saying that God is making all these pieces work together for "good" for those who love him. If you are someone who loves the God who revealed himself in Jesus, trust that all the pieces of your life is working together for the good. It may not be the good you envisioned, but in the great scheme of God's purposes for you and for his world, it would be good.